You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
