the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
