Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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