found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
you are never too drunk for berry picking
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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