She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
