Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just put wine in my tea
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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