Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
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