Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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