Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize