Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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