Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
