so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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