So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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