They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
