This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
