someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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