I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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