windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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