Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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