Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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