Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
