Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
