I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize