Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
