Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
she pinky promised me she was 18
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
