i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
