Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
