I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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