i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
do nipples grow back?
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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