the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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