i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
