Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
