you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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