well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
