Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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