do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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