Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
