Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
