Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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