my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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