I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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