I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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