Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
