party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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