Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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