Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
