Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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