Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
