It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
True strength comes from lack of pants
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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