Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
third nipple confirmed
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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