you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
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In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
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We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.