so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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